In May 2009, a month in which the economy shed 345,00 jobs, ESPN announced it would be hiring [former Detriot Lions CEO Matt] Millen as a football analyst.
"I can't believe this guy got an interview, let alone got hired," said Bainridge, WA textile designer Cynthia Anderson, whose fabrics were considered among the field's best before the collapse of the domestic apparel industry in 2010. "What motivation do I have to go out there and apply for work while this dipshit is on national television?"
When approached for details, ESPN initially refused to comment on its hiring practices or reasons for employing Millen, who was a catastrophic failure at every level of football that did not involve tackling and is perhaps the man most synonymous with football-related ignorance in living memory. Sources at the network also refused to comment on the wisdom of showing the flagrantly employed Millen during broadcasts watched by many of the nation's jobless.
By the way, how nuts is it that both the Lions and the Niners are 5-1 and considered two of the best teams in the nation? Pretty nuts. Like, ESPN-hiring-Matt-Millen nuts.
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